I feel like Job... with sores all over my body.
Okay... well I guess I don't have sores all over my body, but I do have this huge honken pimple on the end of my nose and it is making me all self concious. I have a big nose already, and really, that doesn't bother me because it fits my big head... but the zit on the end of my nose makes me notice that: PEOPLE ARE NOT LOOKING AT ME IN THE EYES. But rather, they are looking at my big red shiny nose... thinking, "GOOD GOVENOR! LOOK AT THE SIZE OF THAT THING!!!" They are in awe of the grandure of such a huge, inflamed pimple. I notice that their eyes get really big and then they realize that they are staring and then they look away quickly... and then they don't look at me because if they do... they know that, like a curious monkey to a shiny object, they will be drawn back into it's mesmerizing power. And the worst part is, I have had it for about a week... and it was getting better... but then I picked the scab and now it is festering... so it is my own fault. I had this vision this morning that it is going to get infected and then I am going to have "red streaks" going up the bridge of my nose and then the infection will effect my brain... and then I am done for.
Needless to say, it's not a pretty sight. It's a good thing I am married... that way I don't have to worry about "total rejection." Just call me Rudolph. And no... you don't have to allow me to play in any reindeer games... it's okay.
Really. It sucks to be me today.
posted by Greg at 11:02 AM
7 Comments:
I used to think that pimples were just a "teenage thing". Alas! Apparently, they continue to rear their ugly "heads" throughout adulthood.
Have you tried Jes's treatment? Because it would be an interesting "experiment" to see if you both had the same...concave...results! :P
12:05 PM
so not laughing at your right now, maybe just giggling a little, but only because you described the way people look at you with such style
sorry bout your pimple
12:19 PM
I really needed a good laugh!! Too funny! So sorry about the pimple.
8:37 PM
Yikes! Those are the worst!
It is a good thing you are married, you can just let yourself go and Syd has to still love you. For better or worse!
by the way, A monkey to a shiny object? Do you know that monkeys are drawn to shiny objects? Do you own a monkey? Is that why you know about shaking a monkey maker!
7:33 AM
OK...well...I've not had a big honkin zit on my face in a long time. But, your post reminded me when my wife and I had just gotten back from visiting a friends home. We stopped by because we were going to housesit for them over the weekend. They showed us the ropes at their home and we went home. Upon entering the bathroom and looking in the mirror I noticed a huge smear of something on my shirt that looked like green baby poop! I was mortified. I asked my wife, "What in the world is this....where did this come from?!?" She reminded me that we had also just eat lunch and a Mexican restaraunt where I'd had refried beans and guacamoli on my plate!!!!
2:49 PM
ok, so I listen to talk radio once in a while and your post is kinda ironic because this week they were busy talking about some new ZIT ZAPPING GADGET... yeah! I'm for real... it just zaps them away!
I'm such a sucker for cool gadgets... if you are too ck this out
http://www.t3.co.uk/news/247/general/general/worlds_first_zit-zapping_gadget
6:54 PM
I was going to suggest Jes' treatment too. Maybe then you can post a pic of yourself post-zit, and instead of a red shiny nose, it will have a black hunk on it.
;-)
6:33 AM
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